Not really sure

I haven't been thinking about getting rid of stuff lately. I don't know if I'm getting bored with it or what. Lately when I've been in my room alone I just feel like sad or lonely or something. I'm tired of looking at the same stuff. I'm tired of not feeling satisfied. I honestly don't know what would make me satisfied. I thought it was getting rid of everything. But I've got down to what I'm comfortable with and still am not satisfied. I can't decide if getting rid of things would make me happier or buying a couple things. I just hate how obsessed I am with it! How do I stop obsessing? I like living with less, but I really hate obsessing over it.

I wonder if I should stop reading about minimalism? That might help. When I read things it makes me feel like I need to live my life the way someone else is. ex. Don't buy anything, don't replace things just because you're bored with it, be eco friendly all the time, be able to fit all your clothes in a suitcase. Pressure. I need to do what makes me happy! Sadly, I'm not exactly sure what that is. Sometimes I'll buy something then a month later I won't want it anymore. Lately what I've been wanting to do is like go winter clothes shopping. Go to the mall, replace my crappy jackets for a good one, buy some jeans that don't have holes in them, drink something from starbucks, bundle up in a scarf. Sadly I have no money. I wouldn't buy jeans from the mall anyway. I love plato's closet.

I don't want to buy a lot of things. Just a couple. It's nice to do that every once in a while. I feel like I need some patterned shirts or something. All my clothes are either black, white, or grey. But whenever I feel the need to buy something it's always clothes. If it were other things I'd be a little worried.

Well then I started thinking about decor. Not that I'm going to do anything, I'm just thinking. Lately here the weather has been cooler. Daniel's mom kindly put a blanket in my room for me incase I got cold at night. It was this mostly pink, with a lot of other colors quilt. Very bright in my drab room. For some reason I actually kind of liked it. It got me thinking. Maybe I should add some color to my room. I love black and white but maybe I'm longing for color? I've been browsing while writing this and found something I like!

It's from Ikea and it's only $50! I kinda wish it had some orange in it though since that's kinda my color. I almost feel like I've overkilled myself on white. I like it still. It's just not as satisfying as it was. I tend to overkill myself on things I like. I really wish I didn't do that.