I really want a hobby

Maybe I can make that my new year's resolution. I really want to try photography. I've always wanted to. Daniel bought me a Holga camera for I think it was christmas last year and I've only gone through one roll of film. I don't know anything about it and it's really expensive to get developed. I got the roll developed and only like 1 or 2 pictures were ok. For 2 pictures it was still over $10. I wanna say like $16. I need to get my own film developing kit. It'll be expensive at first, but I don't know. I think it could be worth it. If I really get into it maybe I can get a nice digital camera.

I really want to do more yoga too. I actually really enjoy it. I just need to make time for it. I need to get into shape! But who doesn't right?

Oh yeah that epilator hurts like hell. I keep trying and trying. I'm not going to give up. But I'm kinda sad because even with all the pain the results aren't that great. It's making red marks on my legs for every pore a hair gets yanked out of. It is pulling the hairs! My legs just aren't as smooth as I had hoped for. Maybe it will be once the pores clear up. I've only been doing my legs and that's supposed to be the least painful spot! I can't even imagine doing it anywhere else. My pain threshold should change though. I'm hoping. I haven't even got 1 leg done! I've only worked on the bottom half of my legs and they're not even done.

Well I guess I should get some sleep. My stomach is hurting for some reason.

Results

from what I wanted to complete before the year ended:

What I Completed:

Taken a picture of the art I don't want and got rid of it
Done with the journals thing since they're gone
got rid of the future stuff
just about completely converted to physician's formula (not worried about eye shadows. I still need to get the pencil liner)
Got a flashdrive for christmas (I still need to back up my stuff though, but I've had problems with my portable hard drive)
Went through keepsakes. I got rid of what I could for now

What I didn't complete:

pay library fees (I guess I still could before the new year)
get rid of stuff in "get rid of pile". I'm still mulling some of it over

Pretty good progress! I'm overall pretty satisfied. I haven't been thinking about my room as much lately. There's really not much else I can do.

I've been really anxious lately. I found out I no longer have health insurance. Being a hypochondriac and watching grey's anatomy has not been helping. It's so hard not to think about it. It's just this like sinking feeling. I'm hoping the situation gets solved soon. 

Awesome Christmas! :D

I had a really good Christmas this year! From Daniel I got a car stereo (I got that before Christmas), from my dad I got $150, from Daniel's mom I got an awesome luggage set, a monogrammed really soft and heavy blanket, a flash drive, tire gauge, and candy, she also got a big keurig for the both of us!, from Daniel's aunt and uncle I got a $25 gift card for bath and body works, from my sister I got a $50 plato's closet gift card (I cannot believe that), from my parents I got $175, a $90 epilator (I cannot believe that either!) and physician's formula mascara and eyeliner!

I had a really good year. I can't wait to buy some clothes!

...

I keep getting these ideas for posts which I know are dumb. I'd want to write them, but then I'd feel like I'd look like a fool or something if I posted them because of how unimportant they are. Do I write them and look like a girl who only cares about herself, or do I not write them and hold out?

I hate feeling boring

Ugh. But I don't know what would make me feel more interesting. Interests and hobbies probably. I'm not passionate about anything. Besides minimalism. But that's not a hobby. I like to write, but not really anything besides this blog. I don't know. Just feeling down.

My Dream House

Would probably look something similar to this:

So excited!

For our cabin trip! We leave on Tuesday! It will be so nice just to get away from everything. Work mostly. It's gonna be so fun! I wish it was going to snow though, but I don't think it will. I went out and bought hiking boots. They're pretty crappy though. Not water proof. Oh well. I don't think I'll use them that often. I needed something though. They were only like $17 I think from k-mart.

I tried to pack pretty minimally. My goal is to fit everything in my backpack. Including my boots. So far I've succeeded. All I need to add is a bra and a pair of pants. I think I am going to bring 2 just to be safe. I haven't decided if I want to bring my blow dryer and straightener yet. I should probably give my hair a break. But I don't want to risk getting bangs from hell. I'm not including any of our "joint" things in there because I'm not going to put them in my backpack. There's really not even that many joint things to bring. I think I'm gonna bring my ihome. We may bring some sort of casserole dishes or something cause we haven't decided on what to cook yet. Maybe extra pillows and blankets. We're going to buy groceries there.

I really wish my hair would grow. I know that's like all I've been writing about, but it's been on my mind a lot. I actually trimmed the ends again today because of how damaged my ends are. If I try to grow it like that, it will just keep breaking and never get any longer. I wonder how long I can go without dying my hair. Sometimes I just want to grow my hair out to its natural color. Just because it would be natural. Another look I've been mulling over is like light brown hair with like a big blonde chunk somewhere underneath. just like one or two. I'd have to grow out my dark hair in any situation. If I keep my hair at this length, it will probably take me another year to grow it out. I need to get my hands on some chamomile shampoo. I'm wondering what my natural color would look like with a bleach blonde chunk. That'd be so crazy if I just grew my hair out naturally! Maybe I can let my roots get bad and see what it looks like. I may try that. Probably not but we'll see.

@$@$#@$#

So after all that talk yesterday, I decided to trim my hair (upper layers) and not my bangs. I realized that the right side of my hair barely had any short layers in it and the left side of my head had a ton. No idea how that happens. I thinned out my hair at the bottom too (to get more of the dark out). i think what I may do is just keep cutting my hair like I have been until all the darkness grows out. Then maybe I'll do what I was talking about. I think my hair right now is about 50% reddish and 50% darkish. That's pretty good! I feel like I'm actually getting somewhere. It's very tempting to just cut my hair short to get all the dark out, but it's not worth it. I'm fairly close to being done with my shampoo. so for my next shampoo, I may be bad and get a shampoo that has sulfates in it. I'm thinking pantene pro-v. Sulfates are supposed to fade hair. Then I think for the conditioner I'm going to get the aussie 3 minute miracle stuff. I feel like my hair actually stays in pretty good shape with that stuff. I want to try chamomile shampoo, because I heard that fades hair. I need to find some though. That's awesome! I just looked at my hair and it looks like I cut a lot of the dead stuff out! I wasn't even planning on that! I actually did a better job cutting it out this time than I did the 3 times I tried to specifically do that!

I can't wait until my dark hair is gone! I'm tired of looking at it! I don't know what I'm going to do about my desk. I was thinking, another possibility would be to paint it white. I'm tired of dark furniture. I really wish I had a futon. I think I would be really happy with it. I'd even like just having my mattress on the floor. But there's nowhere for me to put the rest of the bed (to store) and I know Daniel wouldn't let me anyway. Man if I had a futon it would be so awesome. I know exactly where I would put my media stand thing. Great now I want to rearrange my room. I really don't think there's anything else I can do with it though. Ugh. Oh well.


Just to give my mind something to look at instead of trying to mentally visualize it. This is what I would do in my room in the perfect world.

1. Paint walls clean white
2. Get a futon, get rid of bed
3. get the white malm dresser from ikea
4. paint my desk white
5. probably get a white bookshelf for me to put my hobby/desk area things on it

I really want a papillon

I've almost become obsessed with it. One thing that sucks is that they're so hard to find for under like $800. Not like I could get one now anyway. I guess if Daniel and I put our money together we could do it. My ideal papillon would look like this one. However I know that's like pretty much close to impossible. One thing that sucks is that there's such a color variation. Ugh. I need to stop obsessing.

I can't decide if my hair needs a trim or not. Like the short layers. I kind of want it to grow out a bit so I can try to even it out. Idk what to do with my bangs. They're looking kind of long. Honestly I don't even know what my ideal hair style is anymore. I always see asian girls with cute hairstyles. Haha definitely just left my blog for like half an hour to look at youtube videos of asian girls hair. lol. At some point I want to go to a asian/korean hairstylist. That's probably my best bet. Yeah I think I'll just grow it out for a while maybe trim my bangs until I find a place.

I am so bored right now. I can't think of anything to write about. That must be how I know I'm close to reaching my minimalist goal. Cause I can't think of anything else to get rid of besides that stuff I haven't really decided on yet. Although yesterday I was almost considering putting my desk on craigslist. I could probably get $100 for it. It's like brand new condition. It's nice but it's too big. Also it's espresso colored and I've really been into white furniture lately. Although I don't even use my desk much now. Half of me would want to just completely get rid of a desk. The other part of me would want a plain white desk like this one.
Without the black bottoms. I know it would be dumb to sell it, but at the same time I kind of want to. Idk I guess I'll figure it out.

^^^

I've really had no writing material lately. Although I have been moving stuff around my room a bit. I put my dresser back in my closet again (I swear I have OCD). I also took out all the "objects" that were in there and replaced the space with just about all my wardrobe. I don't have my winter jackets in there or my summer clothes. I actually have quite a bit of room to spare too! So my closet is more open now. I really hate my closet. it just harvests like all of my ocd tendencies. I really hate that I do these sort of things, but if I don't do it, it just keeps eating at me until I do it. It makes it really hard to be productive in anything else.

I feel kind of weird

Not really sure why. Probably because Daniel's asleep and I'm not and usually it's the other way around. At least at night. I should probably go to sleep, but I'm not quite tired enough yet.

I really want some new clothes. I need some variety. I need more clothes I like. The clothes I've got rid of thus far have been things that were either worn out or not the style I'm going for or don't wear.

I just thought of something I may do. At the end of the year, since nobody really reads this I may just save the entries on my computer and get rid of them. That way I can start fresh.

I guess I should go to sleep.

On Christmas break!!

I'm done with all my finals! I got a B in accounting 2! hehe I got a B in accounting 1 and 2, when statistically most people get one letter grade lower. Also after pulling my moms leg I got my tuition paid for! I'm so thankful! That's such a huge weight lifted off of me! The only thing I need to worry about now is turning in my paper work to graduate (with my associates) after this semester. It shouldn't be too bad. Now (well after Christmas) I can finally start looking for something better job wise! I'm really excited. I'm so happy to be on break. After a 5 day a week semester this is really nice.

Now I can spend time doing stuff I really want to do, blogging, learning to knit better, hang out with my mom. Maybe some yoga. Oh yeah more good news! I think I found a type of contacts that works with my eyes! I'm ecstatic! I haven't bought them yet, but I have in a trial pair. My eyes get a little blood shot, but nothing near what it was before after wearing them for only like an hour. They're supposed to let in more oxygen or something like that. It's been awesome! I've felt so much more confident about myself.

Not much going on minimalism wise. Just been enjoying it I guess. lol. I'm feeling pretty optimistic :) I actually don't feel like I have anything to write about lol.